Blogging on July 30

I can't decide what I'm posting about today. The almost end of the blogging challenge. I attempted to start a post yesterday about my hopes and dreams for this next year. But after I sat there for an hour and had half of a first paragraph, I gave up. It's not that I don't have hopes and dreams. It is more that I don't want to sound too Pollyanna. I tend to live in a cloud. A pink cloud. And then when I pull my head out (of the cloud.... keep it clean folks!), I plummet to the sewer. I tend to ride the roller coaster around and around and around thinking each time will produce a different result and after awhile I am suddenly sad and disillusioned and, well, bitter. This year our building will be facing an even greater number of new staff and teachers than last year. And I am super excited about it. There is a lot of positive energy in our building right now and a lot of anticipation and excitement. It is contagious and I am really excited. I feel more comfortable in my own skin than I have felt in a long time. Both personally and professionally (not parentally~ that's a word, right? My computer says no). I know that every year brings new trials. But I feel like I'm on track to keep my head when a student is losing theirs. And that is a giant first step. For the most part, I am pretty good at faking it til I make it and keeping a calm demeanor and voice even though my insides are climbing the crisis scale right along with my students. But it is SO HARD to think clearly and stay in my "upstairs brain" when I have an escalated student. I tend to descend to fight or flight myself. But I am becoming more and more aware of my shortcomings as well as more aware of ways to stay in the thinking part of my brain to find solutions. So I feel good about that and I feel confident that it will be a hugely successful year in this regard. I have a dream that students will know how to regulate their emotions, know how to calm themselves down and how to respond appropriately when they feel uncomfortable! Crazy, right? Well, I know it can happen. Not by osmosis, but through direct teaching and continuous modeling. So I have hopes and dreams for my team. That we'll all use loving and kind voices, words and actions to help students learn how to regulate their voices and actions. They have a legitimate right to their feelings. And to process them. My hope and dream is that they feel safe and loved.

I have a lot more hopes and dreams. About my dream team and how my colleagues and I will interact this year. I'm going to ride my pink cloud until it dissipates. And I'll try to stay grounded in reality enough to be flexible and learn new skills and solutions instead of doing things that don't work and expect amazing results.